our FATHERS????? ;-)

“Honor thy father and thy mother…”

(Exodus 20:12) 


Sounds simple enough, right?
Any of you that have parents (which better include all of you!! ;-) know that statement is not always true. We know we need to, and should, honor and obey our parents, but as fleshly, sinful human beings, honor, submission, and obedience are not things that always come easily for us.

But I’d like to focus on the relationship between you (as a young woman) and your father, for the next few moments. :-)
I am currently in the process of reading a book about the Biblical design for fathers and daughters and just how far our society at large and even we as Christians have strayed from the multitudes of examples laid out for us in Scripture.
The book and its authoresses strongly advocate returning to this model laid out for us in Scripture, which is something that the Lord has actually been bringing to pass in my own life over the course of the last few years (right before and ever since my graduation from home school—programmed/ Christian high-school). I’m not perfect, and neither is my Daddy (although he is quite wonderful! :-) ), and I understand that while many young ladies and their (your) fathers (and mothers) will agree with me on the general principle concerning this issue, we each have a personalized way that we go about it, based on the way that the Lord is teaching us, leading us, and revealing to us through His Word. J I also realize, that through no fault of your own, not all of you have great relationships with your fathers—and some, quite honestly, may have harsh or hateful fathers. L

So, I am not here to tell you that what you are doing is wrong, or to tell you how great I am because I am doing what I believe to be right. Neither am I here to riddle those who suffer from any type of fatherly mistreatment or neglect with guilt. Rather, I just want to share with you a recent blessing I have received from going “out of my comfort zone” to confide in my father… and what joy, comfort, and relief I was blessed with as a result.
A couple days ago, I was reading in this book, and came across a very significant portion. The question is posed
What kind of attitude does God want me to have toward my father?”
Of course, several answers are briefly discussed (this is a very encompassing topic J for one to cover in depth lol), and some of it is very cut and dry and Biblical (Exodus 20:12) (Ephesians 6:1) even (Ephesians 5:33). But the one paragraph that really caught my attention was this:
Confiding in our fathers (and, of course, our mothers) is another way we can show them honor. When we let our fathers know our heartsour struggles, our weaknesses, our hopes and dreams—it encourages them to pay closer attention to the instruction and guidance they give us. Our fathers can better protect us if they know our weaknesses and struggles and can better lead us when they know what direction we want to be going.” [1]

I could already attest from personal experience that more than one of these statements was and is true, but God was about to use it and the fatherly protection he has placed over my life, yet again, to strengthen and encourage me.
There was (oh and still is LLL) a certain sin that I am struggling with right now. It is one of those ones that is not obvious to anybody, but I certainly know it is there, and it was bothering me. I felt awful. I remembered having read this paragraph the next morning when I again found myself struggling in this area. (Funny how the Lord works things out all in perfect timing—just when you need it—isn’t it? J)
So I confided to my daddy what I was (am) struggling with. I could not do it verbally, so I wrote him a note a little before he left for work and would not let him read it in my presence lol. So he finished getting ready and left for work, while I went downstairs to my room, laid down on my bed, and struggled with guilt, discouragement, and a seeming inability to pray. L I could not take not knowing what he thought, so I texted him, asking if he’d read it and if he had any advice to offer.
No reply.
Not a comforting response!!!!! Lol J
So again lol I sent him a text…
This time, his answer came—
In the form of a 5 page reply
And the words of encouragement and counsel he had to offer, by the grace of God, brought me to tears of relief.

By God’s grace, my dad was able to give me sound instruction and wise counsel exactly for the struggle I was and am facing. (Proverbs 1:8) (Proverbs 4:1) (Proverbs 13:1) (Proverbs 15:32-33) (Proverbs 19:20 & 27) (Proverbs 24:6) (2 Timothy 3:16)
But my daddy would never have been able to give that advice (neither would I have been able to receive itL) if I had not first opened my heart voluntarily to him. He never would have known, he would not be praying for me concerning this, and I would have received no instruction if I had kept this part of me to myself.
The same is true of you, dear sister. I am not perfect. Neither have I arrived because I did this.
I simply hope to encourage you to do the same! If there is something you are struggling with, need advice/counsel concerning, perhaps an unfulfilled dream, or a burden the Lord has laid on your heart that you are having a hard time bringing to reality, I encourage you, dear sister! First, take it to your Heavenly Father, and then (prayerfully, if need beJ) take it in a humble, submissive manner, to your earthly father. Open your heart to him in the same way that you would to your Savior. It will not be as easy. I could not bring myself to confide in Daddy out loud, so I wrote him a note, and gave it to himJ. But the results were equally amazing.
The blessings you can receive, by God’s grace, by being ‘vulnerable’ to your father far outweigh the ‘security’ you will experience if you do not. You may never know what blessings (in your walk with Christ and your father) if you do not!!
Just as you, Lord willingly, share your heart with your Savior, and just as you will one day give your heart to your Husband, share your inner thoughts, dreams, and struggles NOW with the man the Lord has in place at this very moment as the authority in your life.
It will not be easy…
But, dear sister, it is so WORTH IT!!!

[1] So Much More, page 39; emphasis mine J


  1. My relationship with my adoptive Dadddy has always been special. Not always perfect, but a much better relationship than I could have ever hoped for.:)

    My biological dad isn't in my life, and I'm glad for that. He was abusive and would never had given me the love my Daddy does.:)

    There are areas I would like to improve, but our relationship has always been comfortable and laid back.
    God knew exactly what he was doing when he brought Daddy into my mom and I's life.:)

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  3. Thank you for posting this. It is something that all daughters can do with being reminded about. God bless.


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